It was time to move. Here's my new address!

I like Insufficient Focus. Cause it's sooo accurate. But it's easy to misspell and is kind of a hand cramp to type it all out. You would be amazed at the people who don't bookmark.

Until I get bored in my new address and decide to come back here you can find random thoughts and distractions over at

girlvaughn.com

hopefully the 3 people who read me in Google Reader will update. please please please...

dare you! and by you I mean me.

I've had this one in my drafts for a while. I've been afraid to commit. I get like that. Afraid. Of commitment. Don't tell husband.

ANYWAY - it's been in my drafts for so long that I can't remember where I found the link to begin with, I THINK it was from Liz. Seems like a Liz thing. And I mean that with the craziest amount of respect possible. Leave me a comment if you also linked to this site so my 12 readers will know who else rocks my world in the creativity department.

so.

Here's the thing. I like lists. I am trying to get my crafty on because I need even more distractions from my laundry (sarcasm) and I also feel like my brain is going (abso-fucking-lutely true). This list is perfect because it's A) a list, B) crafty and C) inspiring. It should totally keep my brain going for a bit... And by publishing it here, out loud, I am committing to doing these things. right? I think I will do them in order. hmm. Except that walking is SUPER boring. Hmmm. maybe I will do them in reverse order? No. IN ORDER. 1 per week. How hard is that right? I. Can.Do.It.

1 per week. Starting next week because walking is boring. Also, I don't really like poetry. So week 5 is gunna be tough. Also, this list is 100 things long. So I am making a 2 year commitment. sigh. See the first sentence. I.CAN.DO.IT. Also, when it says "draw" I probably won't draw. I suck at drawing. Maybe YOU can do some of the things on here, write about it, email it to me and I will post it on your behalf. We'll get through the list super fast. Just don't do any of the ones I want. Do the (hard) drawing ones. And the walking ones. Email to insufficientfocus at gmail dot com.

i can do it?


The List. by Keri Smith. Author. Illustrator. Guerilla Artist.

1. Go for a walk. Draw or list things you find on the the sidewalk. 2. Write a letter to yourself in the future. 3. Buy something inexpensive as a symbol for your need to create, (new pen, a tea cup, journal). Use it everyday. 4. Draw your dinner. 5. Find a piece of poetry you respond to. Rewrite it and glue it into your journal. 6. Glue an envelope into your journal. For one week collect items you find on the street. 7. Expose yourself to a new artist, (go to a gallery, or in a book.) Write about what moves you about it. 8. Find a photo of a person you do not know. Write a brief bio about them. 9. Spend a day drawing only red things. 10. Draw your bike. 11. Make a list of everything you buy in the next week. 12. Make a map of everywhere you went in one day. 13. Draw a map of the creases on your hand, (knuckles, palm) 14. Trace your footsteps with chalk. 15. Record an overheard conversation. 16. Trace the path of the moon in relation to where you live. 17. Go to a paint store. Collect 'chips' of all your favorite colors. 18. Draw your favorite tree. 19. Take 15 minutes to eat an orange. 20. Write a haiku. 21. Hang upside down for five minutes. 22. Hang found objects from tree branches. 23. Make a puppet. 24. Create an outdoor room from things you find in nature. 25. Read a book in one day. 26. Illustrate your grocery list. 27. Read a story out loud to a friend. 28. Write a letter to someone you admire. 29. Study the face of someone you do not like. 30. Make a meal based on a color theme. (i.e. all white). 31. Creat a museum of very small things. 32. List the smells in your neighborhood. 33. List 100 uses for a tin can. 34. Fill an entire page in your jounral with small circles. Color them in. 35. Give away something you love. 36. Choose an object, draw the side you can't see. 37. List all of the places you've ever lived. 38. Describe your favourite room in detail. 39. Write about your relationship with your washing machine. 40. Draw all of the things in your purse/bag. 41. Make a mini book based on the theme, "my grocery list". 42. Create a character based on someone you know. Write a list of personality traits. 43. Recall your favorite childhood game. 44. Put postcards of art pieces/painting on the inside of your kitchen cupboard doors, so you can see them everyday (but not become deaf to them.) 45. Draw the same object every day for a week. 46. Write in your journal using a different medium (brush & ink, charcoal, old typewriter, crayons, fat markers. 47. Draw the individual items of your favorite outfit. 48. Make a useful item using only paper & tape. 49. Research a celebration or ritual from another culture. 50. Do a temporary art installation using a pad of post it notes & a pen. 51. Draw a map of your favorite sitting spots in your town/city. (photocopy it and give it to someone you like.) 52. Record all of the sounds you hear in the course of one hours. 53. Using a grid, collect various textures from magazine and play them off of each other. 54. Cut out all media for one day. Write about the effects. 55. Make pencil rubbings of six different surfaces. 56. Draw your garbage. 57. Do a morning collage. 58. List your ten most important things, (not including animals or people.) 59. List ten things you would like to do every day. 60. Glue a photo of yourself as a child into your journal. 61. Trasform some garbage. 62. Write an entry in your journal in really LARGE letters. 63. Collect some 'flat' things in nature (leaves, flowers). Glue or tape them into your journal. 64. Physically alter a page. (i.e. cut a hole, pour tea on it, burn it, fold it, etc.) 65. Find several color combinations you respond to in public. Document them using swatches, write where you found them. 66. Write a journal entry describing something "secret". Cut it up into several pieces and glue them back in scrambled. 67. Record descriptions or definitions of subjects or words you are interested in, found in encyclopedias or dictionaries. 68. Draw the outline of an object without looking at the page. (contour drawing). 69. What were you thinking just now? write it down. 70. Do nothing. 71. Write a list of ten things you could to do. Do the last thing on the list. 72. Create an image using dots. 73. Do 3 drawings at different speeds. 74. Put a small object in your left pocket (or in a bag), Put your left hand in the pocket. Draw it by feel. 75. Create a graph documenting or measuring something in your life. 76. Draw the sun. 77. Create instructions for a simple everyday task. 78. Make prints using food. (fruit and vegetables cut in half, fish, etc.) 79. Find a photo. Alter it by drawing over it. 80. Write a letter using an unconventional medium. 81. Draw one object for twenty minutes. 82. Combine two activities that have not been combined before. 83. Write about your day in an encyclopedic fashion. (i.e. organize by subject.) 84. Write a list of all the things you do to escape. 85. Cut a random shape out of several layers of a magazine. Make a collage out of the results. 86. Write an entry in code. 87. Make a painting using tools from the bathroom. 88. Work with a medium that is subtractive. 89. Write about or draw some of the doors in your life. 90. Make a postcard that has some kind of activity on it. 91. Divise a journal entry using "layers". 92. Divise an entry using "layers". 93. Write your own definition of one of the following concepts, sitting, waiting, sleeping (without using the actual word.) 94. List 10 of your habits. 95. Illustrate the concept of "simplicity".

shit, I don't know what subtractive means.

Dangerous Neighbors, Hal Fishman, and German automobiles.

Today in LA there was a standoff between the poeleece and some dude. I never met the dude. I can't say anything about him. Other people who may or may not have met the dude think it's cool to say things about him. Private, gossipy things. And my local newspapers think it's cool to report this nonsense as news.

The Daily Breeze said:
"Neighbors who did not want to be identified said ____ "sounds like he could be dangerous," but he has never caused any significant trouble for them.

"He's got issues. He doesn't take his medication, he doesn't do that well," a neighbor said."


Yeh, I'm pretty sure Thelma next door is an expert on mental health.

Also, this was from an article called: "Westchester neighbors say standoff suspect needs meds for mental issues"

I'm sorry - but who the fuck cares what the neighbors think? Get a freaking doctor on the phone. Get HIS doctor. But they can't. If someone who actually knows something about this man cannot talk to the news nobody should. And why is this its OWN story? Good grief people - are we THAT desperate for entertainment?

And BTW, where is the follow-up mention from the neighbors of what they did to help this man if he was doing so poorly. Love thy neighbor and all the biblical bullshit? I guess gossip about and slander thy neighbor is good enough. I thought that was only ok when you did it on Sundays. And on the 7th day they talked shit? no?

Ok - so you say, well it's the Daily Breeze, circulation South Bay, what do you expect. Right. Well I went looking for ACTUAL NEWS and headed over to ktla.com**** and, lemme tell ya, Hal Fishman is sooo rolling over in his grave** because freaking KTLA cited The Daily Breeze. They did say that the police "would not publicly identify" the suspect but apparently KTLA, who is owned by the Tribune Company who also owns the LA Times*, was not bothered by that and cited the Daily Breeze for providing it - along with more genius quotes from nosy neighbors.

Also, they did not spell Volkswagen correctly.

I guess my point is - don't talk about things or people you know nothing about. Sorry, Thelma, I guess I just assumed you don't know anything about mental health and that you don't have an actual job because you were free in the middle of the afternoon to talk to "reporters" - maybe you work from home. Maybe you are a therapist who works from home. Maybe you are *his* therapist and that is why you didn't want to be identified. Yeh - I'm gunna go with that.

--- uh, also KTLA just updated their story - but they didn't actually change anything in the story they only changed the title to say that he is in custody. The neighborhood still thinks he is dangerous. By the time you click on the link the story will probably be different and Volkswagen will probably be spelled correctly. Trust me it was all there. The neighbors might say I'm crazy but I know typos when I see 'em. (note, I did not proof read this post. Do as I say, not as I do.)


* see, in my head, since the Tribune Company owns both LA Times and KTLA, KTLA should be more reputable. Although I have not read the Times in a while***, so who knows how reputable they actually are.
** I dunno maybe he was cremated, he seems like an open-minded guy.
***I am NOT renewing my subscription stop calling me.
****I don't know why I thought this was "actual news". I think I was looking for a video of his car being rammed.

Superstitions save more than just baseball games.

I am really sort of superstitious. If I allowed myself I could easily never step on a crack or wake up at 6:30 am again (9/11). ANNND Since I have enough cute little quirks I don't have a lot of extra time to freak out about weird and seemingly random shit and I need to really focus my crazies. Some things cannot be ignored though.

Many years ago I had the wooooorst stomach ache. I was totally convinced it was gas (sexy) or stress (because husband has me convinced that every ailment is stress related). It hurt so bad I could barely walk, let alone drive, and had to get a ride to work (oh, conservation!). I snapped at my boss (she deserved it). I couldn't eat or sleep for 2 days. And I was just generally miserable (along with everyone around me). I was IM'ing with a good friend about my aches and pains and somehow over IM we decided that I should go across the street from my office to Sav-On and get a snack and some Gas-X. After the Reese's Peanut Butter Cups and pills didn't work I FINALLY called my doctor who told me to go straight to the emergency room. So I IM'd my friend again and asked her if she could take me to the ER at around 8 that night (apparently when my doctor says "immediately" I hear "In 5 hours") because Future-husband-to-be had a hockey game and we didn't think it would be worth it for him to miss it just because I had tummy ache. Turned out I had a benign tumor the size of 2 softballs. No shit. I TOTALLY blamed Sav-On. Every time I went into the Sav-On or drove past ANY Sav-On I blamed them for my tumor. Those Peanut Butter cups gave me a TUMOR! (I did not, however, stop eating peanut butter cups. It wasn't their fault, it was Sav-On's fault.)

And today I saw a tweet about the scammers at the Jiffy Lube on Pico and Cloverfield. Ugh. That Jiffy Lube. A couple years back I was pregnant for like 65 seconds and that Jiffy Lube was one of the last places we went while I was still pg. I completely and totally blame that Jiffy Lube for causing that miscarriage. Not because of fumes, or toxins or poor customer service. For absolutely no other reason than I went there and something bad happened right after. Stupid Jiffy Lube.

Actually. Now that I think of it. Jiffy Lube and Sav-On had to be in cahoots. Because of the tumor I got at Sav-On I lost one my ovaries. And even though the doctors' say that has absolutely nothing to do with fertility or reproduction I just refuse to believe that could be true and I know that my LAUSD health classes have taught me more than their med-school-ing, even though I didn't actually *pay attention* in school and especially in health class. Except when they talked about how snorting drugs will make your nose disappear - that shit totally scared me straight.

Moral of the story - don't go to drug stores and don't get your oil changed and you will live a long, healthy life with all of your ovaries. Even if you're a dude.

Sometimes the pressure to come up with a snappy title is just too much

Man, I was on a roll for a while there. Random thoughts left and right. Up and down. Forwards. Backwards. Upside down you turn me??

Totally lost my mojo after that "hey, you can call me Webster because I totally redefined 'creativy' based on what *I* think is creative even though the most creative thing I have done this year is decide on what to have for lunch" incident.

Time heals. Random thoughts starting to pop up again and the urge to whack them back down is lessening.

You've been warned.

Wood you like some paper?

I saw these cards at Borders recently and instantly and seriously fell in love with them. They're WOOD dudes!

I want them all...

Night Owl Paper Goods. Love.

for real. it doesn't get any sweeter.

creative: resulting from originality of thought, expression, etc.; imaginative

Today someone told me that they thought one of the, uh, methods I use as a creative outlet was, in fact, not creative. That's weird. I mean wouldn't I know what my creative outlets are? Isn't that one of those things that's subjective? We don't have to all think alike do we? We don't have to all like and do the same things right? I mean, isn't it BETTER that we don't all love the same restaurants (imagine the wait for a table), the same bands (I don't like those big venues), the same shoes (hard enough to find your size). Imagine how much harder it would be to find a significant other if we ALL found the exact same qualities in a person attractive.

Be strong. Be different. Be creative. It's scary but critics can't matter when you are answering your calling*. If the comments are not constructive, if they are not from a loving place, don't listen. Unless your creative outlet is stealing, murdering, raping, or lobbying for high fructose corn syrup have the fuck at it. If they don't like what you create they can ignore it.


*no, Twitter is not "my calling" I'm making a bigger point here. sheesh.

I can probably pour milk on my own, right?

My husband cooks. Yep. That's right. COOKS! And he kicks ass at it too. Even if it's "just" salad or heating some leftovers - he has the magic touch for real.

The biggest mistake I can make is to not make plans when he is out of town. Like Wednesday night. He was gone for just one night. I thought: "easy. I can make a baked potato. Eat in. Get to bed early. Piece-o-pie."

wrong.

I SWEAR, all I did was heat, in the oven (recommended) some frozen veggie chicken patties and heat, in the microwave, a baked potato. Yeh Yeh - I know, the oven is better but the chickies were already in there and, bitch please, I do not have the patience to wait an hour for a potato. The chicken was meh - was ok I guess for fake chicken. I think it had freezer burn - it tasted like it had come out of the microwave - mushy and not cooked enough but still hot. And the damn potato was overcooked! AND I burned my thumb on the damn plate.

Cereal or eat out with the girls from now on. That's it. No more of this "cooking" stuff for me.

A few more words about 500 Days of Summer

Some things I meant to say in my "review" and totally forgot because I was too busy being out of focus.

1) Here is a really cool guide to the locations visited in the movie.

LAist Map of the Day: The Landmarks of 500 Days of Summer

2) At the Century City showing we saw what is possibly the saddest movie trailer in the history of movie trailers. I do not cry at movies. I hardly cry at all. That would require a heart. And emotions. ANYWAY - I cried. It sooo hit home for me, but even my friend who comes from a "good, loving home" was reaching for the tissues. It is executive produced by Oprah & Tyler Perry (say what?) and was a Sundance film that earned a gang of awards and was described in one review "perversely gloomy." Fuck yeh. I. cannot. wait. to see it, and I am already prepared for the complete and total emotional breakdown I am going to have after I see it. We all need goals right! Man, between this movie and The Road - I am looking forward to drinking very heavily those few months.

Get your tissues. Check it: Precious.